10.9.10

Emotional Outburst Reason 4b

I need this weekend.  It's not that I'm that tired but I need some fun.  My life right now consists of waking up, riding the bus, working, riding the bus, a bit of time on the interwebs and then bed.  Rinse.  Repeat.  I also lost my key card which is really not cool.  I'm pretty sure that it is $25 to replace.  I thought that I had it on my sweater that I wore yesterday and had just forgotten to take it off but I presume that is not the case as it is not there now.

Part of the whole "no me time" thing is also the whole "no social life" thing.  I miss everyone back home.  It really sucks as I am without a telecommunications device at the moment.  I hate that I can't text Julia throughout the day or call Mikay to hear how the latest Waxies gig went.  I want to just sit on the couch and have a big discussion about nothing in particular with Nora.  Most of all, I want to be able to see everyone and get a great big hug.  I could use that about now.

Class went better yesterday but I'm still not feeling great about teaching skills and feeling really crappy about my Chinese skills.  We were calling about ESL classes and I got to hear Alex speaking Chinese and he totally kicks my ass.  I knew that I wasn't anywhere near fluent but I'm coming to the realization of just how far away I am.  Also, my students have incredibly limited English and they know that I speak some Chinese which means that if they have a question, they automatically resort to Chinese.  It also means that I can't help them.  That feeling of helplessness just gets heaped onto the pile of all the reasons why I need a hug.  Boo!

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